These last few weeks have been hard work. Adrian has been struggling with extreme tiredness, lack of appetite, nausea, vomiting and just generally feeling lousy- too poorly to even concentrate on writing so Peanut has continued being the stalwart right hand man she always is but she too could not summon up much enthusiasm.
So they apologise for not keeping their followers up to date and allowing them to worry. But they were still marching on, trackless towards a very sure and certain destination, but with no timescale.
These days saw a splendid array of friends who have came to visit and cheer Adrian up, which they did immensely. And although it might seem to them that they tired him out, in fact they perked him up and give him some focus for a laugh and a joke. As a result of this they had many gifts of sweets, chocolates and flowers to brighten up the Folly.
Worth also bought Gates a small toy soldier to keep her safe come the day when he is not around to advise her. He is a brave bold chap and will travel with Peanut wherever she goes, but for now he sat on the mantelpiece infusing himself with essence of Adrian preparing himself for his new role. It is a big role to fill.
They also had the added distraction of the District Nurse coming every day to refill Worth’s syringe driver with his medication, but the end result was more comfort for Adrian so it was all worth while.
So we get to the end of the year with Adrian in very poor health, struggling to eat, confused to distraction. This time it did not resolve itself. This time the big C meant business and there was nothing left to keep it at bay. The irony was that having won its battle it would then expire itself, for without Worth to host its parasitic greed it would cease to exist. What a vile disease it is. So Peanut could only sit and watch as Adrian slipped away hoping his anxiety and distress could run its course with as little unpleasantness and time as possible. It seemed impossible to think that only two weeks ago they decorated their tree together.
The last day of the year; will it end badly or will the next begin badly? All was resolved by ending badly. Poor Adrian died the morning of New Years Eve.
For Peanut the immediate prospect is too awful to contemplate but once the initial tasks are done then she will remember to smile for him.
Adrian always loved her smile.